egg Magazine Review! [LENGTHY]

Leave a Comment
Maybe it's just me, but I've noticed there's a lack of discussion about the egg mag revival in the groups? Somebody just asked me when the magazine was gonna drop and I was like uh... it dropped 3 weeks ago... lol. Seriously, nobody is even paying attention to it. I'm going to review the magazine and channel and see if they have a good reason for snubbing our favourite magazine like this.

Okay, egg magazine began in 1995. Middle class Japanese girls started lightening their hair and getting light tans. They wore slightly more provocative than average clothes and spent their time worrying about their appearance. This was gyaru fashion's beginning.

egg 1995å¹´ 9月 vol.1  ↓↓
Everybody and their mother has seen this cover.
Then, the former yankii started infiltrating the style taking the tans, Spice Girl inspired platform boots and Naomi Campbell inspired make-up to the extreme. With girls like Namie Amuro being ambassadors of the style, this era became probably the most iconic.

Aaah Buriteri. Girls like this looked completely different to the founders.
egg died a painful but premature, short death not so long after. With J-Lo and Beyonce dominating the charts, RnB became a thing to people who weren't already listening to it in the 90s. The tans calmed down (for most) and the platform boots finally became retired.

Ngl, if the 00s kept the platform boots, it would definitely be my favourite era.
Then the OG gyaru grew up and a lot of them started careers in the red light districts. Lots of girls dreamed of becoming princesses or celebrities and wanted to present themselves in a way that was very individualistic. This was very much the start of the gyaru boom. The next generation turned to this style.

Since Ageha magazine spoke to the princessy types, egg magazine went the opposite way and appealed to the grittier gals.
Not long after, circle lens became a must-have item and brand started releasing more appealing fake eyelashes just for gyaru. Now anyone could get into the style because there were different flavours to match all personalities. Girls who liked sweet clothes could go to Liz Lisa, individualistic girls could go to JSG, older girls could still wear their favourite Me Jane and CoCoLuLu was still booming.

Girls like Kanako at the front were proper pioneers. This is truly the best era.
The style was at the top. Everybody wanted to become like the gyaru. Everyone dyed their hair and wore colour contacts, even if they didn't want to go as far as participating in the antics they read about in Animal Talk. Then all of a sudden, in June 2014, we are presented with this cover:

What the hell was this? 
Shortly after, everyone's favourite magazine died and gyaru vanished from the streets of Shibuya. Most of the models stuck to their own post-gyaru style, keeping eyelashes and blonde hair but trying oh-so-hard not to be considered gyaru. A lot of current and former gyaru keep talking about the style as if to egg on (see what I did there) a resurgence. A revival. A reissue. So after nearly 4 long years of thinking egg was gone for good, we were blessed with this:

I promise, this is where the real review starts!

Egg came back as an online only magazine. It has online articles over at as well as a Youtube Channel. The Youtube Channel is mostly filled with introductions, skits and the models' favourite cosmetics.

The online magazine is actually where it's meaty. There are interviews of OG gyaru, Animal Talk articles, the models' own blog posts and make-up looks!

They even interviewed Queen Nemoyayo!
The oldest model is the 18 year old Pito who has just graduated from high school. She's my favourite so far.

Profile | Self Introduction

Then there's Aimi who for some reason has a lot of haters. I noticed her style fluctuates a lot but then she's still only in like her first year of high school (technically second year now).

Profile | Self Introduction
Next up, we have Aina.

Profile | Self Introduction
 Then we have everyone's favourite energetic Nagi.

Profile | Self Introduction
And last, but not least, we have the babyfaced Momo!

Profile | Self Introduction
The other two girls Maami and Miyu have yet to do their self-introductions. I think they might make their appearances sometime this month.

Okay, so it's time for what most people are wondering: my opinion on the new magazine. Honestly, I'm starting to look forward to Loveggg more than I did the egg revival.

Egg magazine was known for showing the strongest, flashiest and most outrageous gyaru. If you wanted to be half-hearted, then you should leave and go to Popteen instead. The profile pictures for most of these girls is borderline catfish. The girls all look great here but when you watch the videos and see their selfies, they are much more toned down (except for Pito, which is why she's my favourite lol). The worst offender is definitely Momo, though I'm using her age and the sudden gyaru revival as her defence and pretending that middle schoolers never used to wear heavy make-up back in the day. I remember when everyone looked at 2014 Happie Nuts and declared the models 'not gyaru'...

Happie Nuts Magazine
I'm not sure whether to laugh or to cry.
Fashion wise, the models dress so... plain. In 2018 with this uncertain gyaru phase, I'm not surprised the make-up is so subtle. But when I look at certain model's clothing, I wonder what exactly about them says (not even 'screams') 'egg'.

Believe it or not, this was their promo picture.

I do have hope though. Not only is Pito amazing, the revival of egg and the introduction of Loveggg could mean that the girls will want to start standing out again. I wrote it better on Twitter.

The new egg magazine isn't displaying any 'hunger'. Loveggg looks like it will bring that 'hunger' back because the people who lived those pre-2014 days will know exactly how amazing the culture was, how it felt to go Campus Summit, what it was like to stand out from everyone else, what was the gyaru community. These models are too young and I wish they'd hired at least one slightly older model because most of these girls weren't even in middle school yet when egg was still alive. They don't even need to be out of the age range, just 19 or 20 - the same age as myself who was 16 when egg died. Maybe that's why I like Pito so much, she probably saw that era first-hand since she's the oldest.

Next up is the girls' attitudes. Do we have a Kawabato Kanako among us? So far, I think the craziest girl is Nagi. She seems to me like the one to watch if you want a good laugh. Nobody really stands out in that kind of way to me. If one of the girls had that effervescence like Yumachi or Kanako, it'd feel more like egg. But then, I am comparing mostly written word to video. Compare our new egg models to Yumachii and Yukipoyo.

Hopefully, when they get to know each other a bit more it will look more like:

Now it's more about the content in general than the models. The content of the Youtube channel is still finding its feet. The biggest and probably most obvious thing to do would be showing how each model does her make-up since, y'know, this is egg. They still haven't done that yet and you'd think it'd be one of the first things they'd do. "Gyaru is back! You want to be like us? Here's a make-up tutorial!" Nope. Instead they're doing popular videos like 'What's in my bag' and 'Favourite cosmetics' which I don't really care about. Hopefully it will get them some promo but it's still a bad move.

Some of the videos show the models getting to know each other and their personalities. I do like it, but this isn't AKB48. Having the models display their likeable personalities and getting them to do skits can be a good way to bring people to the channel. But as I said before, none of the girls have Kawabata Kanako's personality and it just feels... Plain.... Too calm... Not 'wild' or 'sexy' enough compared to the channels run by other gyaru. If you had one girl there sitting cross-legged and rolling her 'r's, I'd be more interested. Instead I'd rather watch Usatani Paisen's videos because her personality is great to watch and she's genuinely entertaining and more gyaru.

The online magazine is much more interesting to me. The articles are very reminiscent of egg before 2014. Navigating the website is a little bit of a hassle if you don't know exactly what you're looking for. It does show you the most recent articles but if you want to go backwards, then you have to know which category you have in mind. They are Entertainment, Fashion, Beauty and Animal. 

The only problem I have with the online website is the focus on Entertainment. Most of that is just links to their Youtube videos - most of which are about Entertainment. This means the one thing egg should be highlighting (fashion) is being overlooked. There's pretty much nothing highlighting trends and what the models are wearing. There's no street snaps. There's only a mention of Dazzy and that's pretty much it.

I did enjoy what I've read from the Animal section though, even if there's not much to it yet. The story I read was quite mild and a lot more believable than some of the Animal stories you'd get back in the day. I would go into detail about the story but I still haven't decided whether I want to allow this blog to get more than a PG-13 rating yet lol. You can read it here though.

So, it's time to close this review!

- egg's back!
- Changing from a magazine to a Youtube channel was a very smart move since nobody wants to spend money on magazines anymore and this generation is all online. The content is free for the consumers but the models and co can still make money from revenue. So win-win.
- The website header is gorgeous and brings that nostalgia in.
- I like Pito's style a lot! The way she dresses and does her make-up feel to me like she picked up where egg left off back in late 2013 and early 2014. Her make-ups is still lighter than 'egg' but her dress sense and the way she carries herself makes up for it.

- The average age of the models is too young. Since egg targets <20 and it's youngest fanbase is probably at least 21-22, it shot itself in the foot by not having models who could have missed the magazine.
- Too much focus on Entertainment when it's supposed to be reviving gyaru fashion.
- The girls look far too plain to be 'egg'. They should have at least done an oldskool-style photoshoot to inspire them and the readers. They can wave the old magazines around all they want but the models don't look anything like them.
- Lack of content. It's only just started but it doesn't feel like a month's worth of content yet and it's nearly time for the next 'issue'.

So, time for my final verdict! I rate new egg magazine as of April 2018... Drumroll!

A good 4/10.

It's like they've forgotten 'get wild, be sexy!'. There's nothing really wild about any of these girls! Look at that 1995 cover again and tell me, does that girl stand out? Her make-up was light but so was her hair and her skin was tanned. Now do the same for each of the covers I posted and then look at New egg and that JK edition cover because the models look too similar to that and in their profile pictures, their make-up is a lot heavier for some of them than on Youtube. There's no rebellious essence here.


More 2018 Goals!

Leave a Comment
This past month or so, pretty much all of my energy has gone towards either my birthday or my university choices.

After I applied for student finance and re-read all of the prospectuses again, I got an email from one uni saying I'd have to do an interview between now and June and another one saying I'd have to sit an entrance exam.

Going all the way to London for an exam was not something I had in mind for this year, but it gave me the opportunity to have a look around what could be my future campus. I'm still not sure if I'd actually want to go there but I liked the look of the campus itself a lot.

The outside of the buildings looked like banks or something. Everything was overly posh and done up and unassuming. I actually thought I might have gone into the wrong building at first but as soon as you step inside, it screams 'college' at you from every angle.

The uni town was the epitome of 'London Gentrification' lol. All the cafes and trinket shops surrounding the place made me think I'd walked into Hipsterville. The way the roads turned and the look of the building actually in the town were very friendly and 'small town'.

The thing what turned me off was.... London. You know exactly what I mean. Homeless people everywhere with bottles in brown paper bags, the annoying transportation system (why can't I just give a bus driver my money smh) and the fact that I'd never seen an area of London with so few black people before in my life lol. The place is going downhill in the same way Brum Town is and all the interesting (imo) parts of London are too bloodclart far for me to bother.

The uni has the lowest student satisfaction in the country apparently. It's one of the top unis in the country and going there could help set me up for life but I keep asking myself whether it would be worth it. I'm not the most studious of people and like to play hard as well as work hard. If I choose a uni where the social life is shite, it's not going to go well. I'd rather get my Bachelor's from another Russel Group uni and transfer over to there for my Masters' than go to a crème de la crème uni and either ruin my mental health or end up dropping out lol.

Then there's the fact that the other uni I would choose has a course that is much more what I want to do. Any course that let's me go abroad sounds brilliant to me but getting to choose which country as well? Let's just say it's a good enough offer for me to consider allowing this posh uni lol.

I'm about to have a look at another gym today. While I baaaadly want to do Muy Thai, the places that do it are just too pricey. I'm taking myself to a standard boxing gym to see how it goes.

I told my friend about my fitness goals again and he was telling me that if I go four times a week (which is a lot and my maximum) then I should see a difference. I'm not going to lie, I'm already seeing a lot of difference right now without much exercise so when I get in the gym, I should be a size 12 at the biggest by the time I need to go to uni lol. Seriously, I looked at myself sideways in the mirror and sooo much of my backfat is gone. I might even go down a clothes size again soon because the new tops I bought are slowly getting baggier.

I think reason I carry weight well despite my insulin resistance is that I'm naturally more of an hourglass and tall. I've seen people who are bigger than me with a better posture even though they weigh less. This could be a good thing for me in the long run but also means I might look at myself and decide I look good before I've reached my goal lol. Well, I'll see how it goes!


How Am I 20?

Leave a Comment
I can't believe I went in a full 180 between this birthday and last year's! I even ended up accidentally wearing the same zebra print top I wore on my birthday last year to see Black Panther on Thursday. Best. Birthday. Present. Ever!

Black Panther was such a good movie! The plot, the comedy, the fight scenes. It didn't feel like a superhero movie to me but I still really liked it. Kendrick being in most of the soundtrack helped a lot too. I got to see the whole thing in 3D too. It'd been so long since I went to the cinema.

Then on my big day, I planned to go out with my college friends after lessons finished. As if a blessing from up above, the teacher decided that we just needed to do a couple of things and most of us had already left by 12. Of course, at least half the class decided not to come in for some reason or another so I planned to meet up with the others later and just stayed with my main group of friends for the next couple of hours.

That mostly consisted of drinking until one of them had to go and get their child and then smoking until we went to another college friend's house. While I was in my friend's car, I got an unexpected phone call wishing me happy birthday from cousin.

By the time I got there, I could barely even talk properly lol. I got another unexpected phone call from my granddad this time. He asked me what I was up to and me, being intoxicated af, was just like "I'm uuuuuhhh... at my friend's" lol. Then he did something I never expected and let me speak to my step-grandma who had a stroke last year and now has dementia. She wished me happy birthday and then I heard some other family members calling out to me in the background. I honestly felt like crying right then and there lol. I bet my cousins knew I was far from sober lol.

At one point (there were only 4 of us then), the girl who's house it was and the other girl decided to go out to the shop and left me and my male friend there in the living room lol. I bet they didn't expect to come back and see us watching First Dates: Valentine's Day Edition, having a deep conversation about love, personas and self-expression lol.

I stayed there until late and left just before they were about to get the harder drugs out lol. A bunch of other people started to come over when I'd already called my taxi and my male friend had left. Now I look back, I wonder if he would've stayed if he knew a bunch of girls were coming over lol. I know it's a new age and I'm meant to be trying new things and all that, but taking cocaine is definitely not on the table right now lol.

Large up my male friend for making sure I had fun lol. Seriously, from when we were in college to when he left, it was great. His birthday's not until November (Or was is December?... I remember he's a Sag tho!) and my head's already thinking about how I can repay the favour.

Then I got back home and phoned and thanked the people I hadn't got the chance to speak to yet and had a quick chat with my mum before bed.

I didn't get my camera or Nintendo Switch, but I had one of the most enjoyable birthdays since my 17th. The only thing I could've wished is that my other friend managed to get childcare but we still had fun before that. I wanted her to enjoy the night as much as I did since I feel like she deserves a break.

After I've had a drink, I think I wake up much calmer and get less irritable towards my family members. I was planning to see if my friend's free for sheesha tonight as it's a Saturday but instead, I'm here writing my blog, a lemon face mask on listening to Persona music. I never thought I'd prefer an indoor day when I have money, something to smoke and something to drink on a weekend after birthday but here I am! I might still go somewhere if I feel like it to be fair lol.

[BIG NEWS] egg Magazine Revival!

Leave a Comment
Imagine my reaction when I saw this post by Manya this morning:

❤️🎀❤️🎀❤️🎀❤️🎀❤️ . 私の思い出がたくさん詰まってるegg♡ . eggが今の私を作ってくれて 今の仕事や友達の環境を作ってくれた雑誌🙈💋 . 皆に惜しまれながら休刊になってしまったeggが web版になって復活するんだってーっ\(//∇//)\💕 . @new_eggofficial 何が起こるか楽しみっ❤️✨ . . #自分の表紙初めて並べてみた♡ #素敵な思い出 っ\(//∇//)\💋 #やっぱGALって超可愛い 🙈💓 #私の思い出がいっぱい詰まった雑誌 ♡ #egg復活 !!!!!! #egg復刊 !!!!!!! . #egg #magazine #eggmagazine #gal #egggal #manya #instagood #ギャル #まにゃ #ねもまにゃ #まにゃゆん #japanesegirl #japan #lovefriend
A post shared by manya♡[manamisuzuki] (@x.manya.x) on

If gyaru's dead then how is this here? 

The caption reads something like:

"My memories are full of egg♡
The egg that made the me today,
The magazine that gave me my current work and an environment where I made friends🙈💋
The egg that was suspended and is missed by everyone,
Will be resurrected in online form!💕
@ new_eggofficial
I'm looking forward to what will happen!❤️✨
#I put my covers side by side♡ 
#A lovely memory💋
#Gyaru are super cute🙈💓
#The magazine full of my memories♡
#egg Revival!!!!
#egg Reissue!!!!"

One of the things that was missed the most was egg magazine. egg magazine was a bible for gyaru in the most literal sense. It told you what to wear, how to act, what to be interested in and what other gyaru were up to. All the recommended music, TV shows, dramas, fashion items, general trend, events, everything. It encouraged girls to get wild and be sexy! Without egg, most people just gave up the fashion and allowed it to continue dying. But not anymore!

Gyaru is coming back with a bang! Just look at the #GAL on Instagram and you will see many people, a lot of them in school, still donning the style. The amount of high and middle schoolers I see in gyaru groups started to give me hope for a revival around the end of last year but I never expected this.

When I saw Manya's post this morning, I started screaming. Nothing gets rid of bad cramps like an unexpected surprise lol.

As much as I want to poke fun at Manya for only using covers with herself on the front, they give me life.

Bringing gyaru fashion to Instagram and Youtube is a brilliant move. It has been the place where gyaru communicated with each other ever since the magazines died. Youtube has many former models and online gyaru personalities reminiscing about the good ol' days and showing everyone how they used to do make-up back in '13. Instagram has all of the brand accounts, ex-models and kyabajous in one place where access to their recent looks can be found on your smart phone rather than in next month's issue.

I will definitely miss being able to see the full and glossy pages of egg. So much info was put onto those pages and they were so thick and great quality compared to the magazines in England. No wonder so many gyaru had their favourite pages stuck on their walls back in the day - each page was like a high quality poster.

One of my favourite parts about egg magazines were the poll sections. They used to ask gyaru things like "What eye colour do you wear?" "What is the best eyelash brand?" "What type of man do you like?" and they'd make a little pie chart with the answers.

Then there were those trashy comics they used to make based on the stories readers used to send in - most of them about sex. One of the reasons it's hard for me to let someone have a look through egg is if they decide to open on a page where some cartoon girl is explicitly having a threesome lol.

The adverts used to be of anything. You'd get designer goods, perfumes, mostly things like circle lenses and eyelashes. But then at the back, you'd get full blown discussion rather than just advertisement about weight loss. You'd hear stories from girls who went to X clinic and it helped them lose 4.4kg or took this supplement for a week and they lost 2.5kg. The weight loss stuff used to be mad and obviously photoshopped lol. Only in egg magazine!

Bringing this back and getting everyone's memories stirred up will hopefully encourage a revival on the streets as well as online. If those paripi could get more interested in gyaru again, anything could happen by the time 2020 comes around.

We need a new turn in fashion. Let's hope we see something in 2018.

The Focus

Leave a Comment
My life is going well I'd say. The household loses money every day but thank the Lord, I'm starting to get jobs now. Most of my personal problems were caused by being stagnant and having no money to do the things I wanted to do. The irony is that now I'm starting to bring in some money, things are getting cut left right and centre and I might have to start directly contributing to the household because what I get from my college and from being under 20 isn't enough to keep us afloat right now.

Hobby wise, I went to a MMA class the other week. It was a new class that had just started. When I phoned up the main desk and asked for information, the lady on the phone told me that I would get a free uniform when I start and that the classes were cheap and weekly. To me, that seemed ideal.

So I showed up there all excited and I saw a bunch of kids running around. I just went and sat in the waiting area because I assumed there was a kiddie class going on. Then I heard one of, who I assumed was, the parents saying something about 'waiting in the cafe' and then literally everyone left the hall and went there. I was sat there wondering exactly what was going on because I didn't say I was coming to no kids class and spoke to the guy who was doing the classes.

As soon as I went into the hall, a whole bunch of kids somehow appeared out of nowhere. I asked the man if it was the kids classes right then since I was there a good twenty minutes early. He then said that the classes were mixed. I just looked at all these kids who were no older than 6 and no younger than 2. How was I meant to spar with one of these? My look of horror must have been so obvious lol. Then he was all like 'more people are coming later!' and I just decided I'd wait it out since I was already there.

More kids showed up and one thing felt strange to me. The man who told everyone to go into the cafe turned out not to just be someone's parent, he was also the owner of the hall. Every other person that arrived after me, he greeted and asked if they needed help and etc., yet I was sitting there waiting and he just blanked me. No 'are you here for the classes?' or anything and he walked past me quite a few times. Just based on that, I decided to leave it.

So I decided to look for another place and the first place that came up was one close to me. I've always gone past the place and thought I might as well have a look. The man said he had a slot free later that evening and I was like 'well, I'm bored anyway, I might as well just go' lol. So just after he's taken my details and booked everything in, he's just like 'to start coming regularly, it's £45' and I just pause... '£45? How often is that?' 'Monthly'... I don't think I'm ever lost for words but I was this once lol.

I showed up there anyway with student discount on my mind (I wasn't going to ask him before I'd done my taster and had a look around obviously lol). I had a quick session being taught how to jab, cross and kick as well as the muy thai stance. It's funny how I can run for hours and do starjumps and consistent punches but I can't do 10 press-ups that easily lol. Everything else, I do at normal speed but when I got down to do 10, I went sooooo slowly and could barely go down properly. Same with the sit ups - I was terrible at those too. I was so bad I couldn't stop laughing but I still managed to force out 10 each time.

I was quite impressed by the place. The adult classes after the kids were mostly, if not all men. I decided I would much rather do mixed classes since I would get more enjoyment out of that anyway. But £45 a month... I probably could afford it in full but I would have £0 left for make-up, hobbies and even my driving lessons. Even though I really did like the place and it's in walking distance from my house and on a reasonable bus route if I'm out, it seems like a good place to choose.... At least until I get into uni lol.

I was thinking of swapping out driving lessons for this training gym. Yeah, driving's an important skill, but it wouldn't be useful while I'm at uni unless I'm a designated driver since all the uni housing's stank and wants you to pay for a permit if you have a car. And that's if I could even afford a car after I've passed my test and everything by then.

If I start training, I can go most days of the week. I can learn how to do marital arts again like I've always wanted to do since I was about 8. There's so many pluses to going and it's ultimately cheaper than what I'm paying for driving lessons right now. I didn't think until now how much I was paying for driving lessons. I have roughly 3 lessons a month and it's £23.50 for an hour. That's really steep.

Still, £45 a month is nothing to laugh at. We're losing money by the day at this rate. And I'm still going to want to save up my money for a nice wig/camera. I mean fair enough, my birthday is a week and a half away and I've been promised some spending money but I bet it still won't be enough for what I wanted to save for. But at least it's because I'm committing to something and not just because I don't even have the money in the first place.

A gym is normally £3 a session right? I get 5 sessions a week for a month I'm going to a class rather than just access to equipment so isn't the price standard? There were classes at my old gym but they were for yoga a pilates not for martial arts. It seems to be strict there because when I came out and saw the adult classes, two of the men got told off for not joining in and had to do 100 press-ups each lol.

I don't know whether I'm jumping into this too quickly or not but my health is somewhat back and I've been letting myself feel like a slob for years. If I get to do two things I want at once (martial arts and fitness), then I'll be gucci. Driving lessons I can space it out but with training, I need to go at least 2-3 times a week if I want to excel.

It's not like my current situation is permanent. I've always said that if I want something enough, I'll definitely be able to get it.

I've just remembered something important! I said I was going to review my Gossip Grey lens and I still haven't! Well, I've ordered some Gossip Brown lens so I might as well combine the two reviews. Almost all the time I've been wearing those Gossip Grey lenses.


A Champion of The People

Leave a Comment
It's been such a peaceful Sunday. Too bad Persona 3 is giving me too many feels. I'm playing the female route right now and I couldn't seduce Shinji with a clear conscience considering what was inevitably about to happen.

On Friday after college, I decided I wanted to get my tongue pierced and I wanted it done NOW. My new place charges a whole £20 for a tongue and by chance, my old place was having a sale on. Because my phone was pretty much dead, I had to wait until yesterday to get it done. I finally got around to watching Brotherhood before I left the house.

It was £15 in town so long as you gave £2 to charity. What's £3? Charity's involved, that's what! So I went there and sat down on their bed thingy. I was a bit apprehensive since I didn't recognise any of the staff this time. An apprentice watched as I had the whole thing done. I told the man to make it a little further back on my tongue. I'm not sure if he noticed but because of the way my jaws are shaped and the size of my tongue, if it was in any other place, it could be really annoying to manage.

After that needle went through, I felt like I was in some kind of trance lol. Seriously, I felt weirdly sluggish all of a sudden and it was like it took me extra energy to thank all the staff.

The pain though! It really didn't hurt as much as biting your tongue like people say. But the pain afterwards was pretty brutal. It felt like a combination of someone pinching you in the sensitive spot under your tongue (since that's where the piercing is and everything) and muscle cramp after you've gone hard in the gym for about two days straight. I still tried to eat when I got back. I threw one almond in my mouth and straight away realised I made a big mistake lol.

I read the morning after can be more painful than day one but it actually wasn't that bad! A piece of biscuit at 12-ish did make the pain worse, but after taking an ibuprofen and waiting a couple more hours, I was fine having my Sunday dinner of spinach, cabbage and tomatoey meatballs! I can stick my tongue out and wiggle it without any problems.

Now all I want to guess is how long before anyone notices I got it done lol. I told one friend and that's it. If it heals this quickly then chances are nobody will find out unless I mention it. There's one person I bet will spot it though because nothing seems to ever get past him. Everyone else will either notice and not say anything or won't notice at all!

A guy I get along with at college and I kind of got into a deep conversation. So our mutual friend started telling us something really personal and even thought she didn't cry or anything, I can tell she was fighting back tears. I don't know what to do in those situations but he seemed to be able to handle it well enough. So I asked him: "Do you feel awkward when other people get really emotional?"

He answered in a way I wouldn't have expected him to. This guy is always cheerful and ambitious and I know he can get serious when he needs to but his answer was really deep. He started talking about how he judges based on how significant their problems are and if it's a first-world problem, he'll just tell them to get over it. It was a lot colder than what I expected him to say and he ended up going slightly off-topic by telling me he'd seen all sorts of effed up situations across the world and that you could always look and think "These people have it worse." For a kid with money, that was deep af.

Then he started talking about how people brag about how much money they have and etc., especially in music and I mentioned conscious rap. He said that at the end of the day, these artists really only care about themselves and how much money they have and their families. They don't care about their community as a whole and that's why he doesn't go to concerts and that. This guy is Asian and the conversation, to me, started to go into 'Black Problems' territory so I just thought about his words as they were. I'm not one to talk about black problems to someone who isn't black lol.

Black people, Americans in particular, grow up in some effed up environments. The difference between us and other races is that there's a common theme of it being 'Black vs The System'. We generally don't believe that it's possible to work our way up by getting a degree and a credible profession because black people are less likely to be hired and more likely to be though to of as stupid and lazy - something we know.

When I see rappers brag about the money they've made, the original brag rappers sounded like they were saying: "Ha! You said I would never amount to nothing. Yet, here I am with my Rolex watches, all the women throwing themselves at me, a big house and the most expensive sports cars doing something that I genuinely love! My mom raised me through all of this without my father, so I will keep mentioning how grateful I am to her. My friends had my back growing up when we were all struggling financially, so I will forever love them. Here's to the future!"

Do I think rappers are selfish for only supporting their own? Not necessarily. These are the original people who supported them since day one. It's not hard for me to understand why they are put on a pedestal constantly by rappers across America and even in the UK.

New school rappers are a bit different. Some of them already came from cosy middle class backgrounds. Of course, they may feel indebted to somebody somewhere but not in the same way these 'hood' rappers are. They had nice upbringings, some of them went to private schools - they just make money off the 'street' image and don't even have the courtesy to then support the people who are actually living the lifestyles they inadvertently promote. That's where I draw the line.

I do, however, think that it's very important for rappers and artists to give back to the community where they came from. I look around Birmingham even and see the crashing economy at its finest. Dead shops, empty houses, destroyed parks, closed youth clubs... It just carries on throughout the whole of East Birmingham and I'm sure the other sides have exactly the same problems. Imagine now if Birmingham had few more notable faces. I'm sure Jaykae and Lady Leshurr are comfy, but nowhere near the level that Kanye is to Chicago. So imagine we had our own equivalent to Kanye or Jay-Z and they started putting money towards reviving the place. That would be the sort of Birmingham I'd actually consider staying in long-term. A Birmingham where you can see things grow instead of collapse.

I know, all this from me trying to ask how to be a more sensitive person lol. That guy is full of surprises. But I bet you he'll be the last person to notice my piercing still!


Bravely Battling Boredom

Leave a Comment
Happy 2018 everyone! I can't believe it's been 8 years since the 10s started. We're practically in the New Roaring 20s. 100 years since the flapper girl era... Jesus, we're moving too fast!

It's New Years Day and I'm feeling inactive. I wanted to put my make-up on and hop on a next bus but nope, pretty much everywhere is going to be closed today. Everywhere except the corner shop. Well, I was feeling like picking up some ginger beer!

These past couple of weeks have had some faux Christmassy weather. We had snow up until literally the day before Christmas and then it started falling again on Boxing Day evening. It was snowing again for about half an hour this morning while I was frying some mushrooms. Typical Britain. Most people react to the snow, but I get over it unless it sets.

How I've was stressing right up until December 22nd over an assignment I had to hand in and now I'm feeling... Professionally bored. Last year, I was working a time and a half or double pay but today, I'm wasting a day doing absolutely nothing when I'm actually in the mood for sitting down and making some money!

Apart from the Paigey Cakey vs Leshurr drama and Uncle Murda's Rap Up 2017, I have no means of new entertainment right now. Remember how I said I don't get hangovers? Well after yesterday, all I want is another night out and something to do!

A big part of me feels like I'm losing at something and I don't like it. It's like there's something I'm oblivious to that I really should know. My mind is fully functioning today and the idea of taking a break on a day like this goes against how I'm feeling right now.

I should sit down and make some plans for 2018 and finish my virtual training instead of sitting around feeling on edge! There are things I can do well while I've got time to spare now since I'm not in a leisurely mood.

Do you ever feel like social media is a curse? I mean, when you see who likes or doesn't like certain things, don't you learn something about another person you wouldn't naturally? In 1980, if it never came up in conversation, you probably wouldn't even know what a person thinks about when they're alone yet Instagram lets you look at what your friends are liking in quick time. I think it's strange and borderline invasive in a sort of genius way.

I watched a Lovelyti video where she mentioned the people behind Facebook (not likely Zuckerberg, because let's face it...) used psychologists to find a way for people to be addicted. Getting likes releases endorphin and not getting enough likes can lead to depression and all that. It was a planned phenomenon that they've been banking on through Instagram now as well. They laugh at the idea of social media becoming part of a mental health diagnosis, but it sounds plausible if Facebook Incorporated actually intended to make people addicted to likes.

Previous PostOlder Posts Home